When a loved one is diagnosed with a serious illness, it can be a difficult and emotional time for everyone involved. For one man diagnosed with cancer who lives alone, the only one who could support him during this difficult time is his childhood friend.
An annoyance
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However, this support is met with objection from her husband, who view him as an “annoyance” and believes that his wife doesn’t “need” to go with him to his every chemo treatment.
Honest Confession
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A husband took to Reddit to share that his wife has a friend from childhood named Anthony, and he's not a big fan of their relationship.
“I'm being completely honest here when I say that he and I don't get along,” the husband admits.
Childhood Friend Is An “Annoyance”
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It's not that the husband thinks that Anthony is “rude” or “disrespectful,” it's just that he finds him to be an “annoyance” because of how much time his wife spends with him.
Battling with Cancer
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Now, Anthony has been diagnosed with cancer and must undergo frequent hospital visits for treatment, all while managing life on his own.
The Promise
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The husband recently found out that his wife had promised to accompany Anthony to every single one of his chemotherapy treatments as a form of support, given that he has no one else to rely on during this difficult time.
Struggling with Wife's Absence
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Initially, the husband “had no issue” with his wife's decision to attend all of Anthony's chemotherapy treatments, but as time passed, he started to feel the effects of her absence - such as being unable to see his friends because he needed to stay home with their son so she could accompany Anthony to the hospital.
Supportive Childhood Friend
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When the husband expressed his concerns to his wife about her frequent absences, she defended her decision by pointing out that Anthony needed companionship during his chemotherapy treatments and that she was simply being supportive when he “needs it the most.”
“I let it go but last week was just kind of my last straw,” the husband shares.
Clash of Priorities
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When the wife asked the husband to stay home with their son so that she could attend another chemotherapy session with Anthony, he told her that he had plans to have lunch with his mother and sister and wouldn’t be available.
Does She Really “Need” To?
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When the wife insisted that she needed to accompany Anthony to his chemotherapy session, the husband became upset and told her that she didn't "need" to be with him and could visit him at home the next day instead.
Cruel
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“She threw a fit and called me cruel for forcing her to leave Anthony by himself since she's all he has and that I was making her look bad,” he continues.
The Final Decision
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Ultimately, the husband left the argument with his wife and went to his lunch as she insisted that accompanying Anthony to his chemo session was more important than having lunch with his family.
Selfish
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The wife stayed home but continued to ignore him after he came back, accusing him of being “selfish” for not allowing her to support Anthony during his chemo session.
Controlling
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With his wife's friends viewing him as a “controlling jerk” who has no consideration for Anthony's difficult situation, the husband turns to the Reddit community for answers of whether he was in the wrong for preventing his wife from supporting her friend or not.
“You Sound Jealous And Petty”
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“YTA,” voted one Redditor, shockingly questioning, “You just conveniently can only see your friends on days that Anthony has chemo treatments? Why can't you plan around them if they're pretty regular? It's no different than if it was your wife's family member.”
“Also, why can't your kid come with you to see their grandma and aunt? You are the tiniest bit inconvenienced by all of this, meanwhile, someone very important to your wife has CANCER and you're mad at her for spending time with them?”
“You Don't ‘Need’ To Meet Your Friends”
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“YTA. She's supporting her friend through cancer treatment. Chemo is scheduled well in advance so if you can't work around those appointments, that's on you for not being able to work a calendar,” argued one commenter.
“You don't ‘need’ to go meet with your friends. You could go see them the next day. If you can't see that helping a friend who is going through chemo is more important than going to lunch then... that's on you.”
“Chemo Appointments Are Horrible”
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“YTA,” agreed another commenter. “I hope no one in your family ever gets cancer. Chemo appointments are horrible and your wife will honest-to-God need emotional support after having to watch her friend deal with chemo.”
“It's one day a week. You watch the kids. Wife either watches her friend die slowly and painfully or he gets better but is still sick and has long-lasting health issues from the chemo. Wife has to witness this as it happens. You have the better end of the deal BY FAR.”
“Loyal” And “Caring” Wife
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“Chemotherapy might take several hours, so I understand son can't accompany wife to the hospital. But why can't you bring him to lunch? YTA,” one user wrote.
“The day YOU get cancer I hope you remember you thought lunches should take priority over supporting the sick person- and I hope your wife remembers it too, and goes out for a nice lunch and let you deal with your treatments by yourself. Some guys would be overjoyed that they have a wife that is loyal and caring- but you whine over it.”
The Unpredictability of Chemotherapy
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Someone who claimed to be a former Macmillan receptionist noted that chemo dates can be unpredictable and difficult to plan around due to prep and potential delays, making it challenging to schedule other appointments around them.
“And you'd be surprised how fully booked these outpatient places get,” they added.
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Source: Reddit
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